Jealousy is often referred to as being bitten by the “green-eyed monster” or being “green with envy.” It all goes back to Shakespearian times when the famous writer uses these phrases to describe a character in The Merchant of Venice.

    Green is often used to describe this condition because it’s a color that is notated when someone is sick. For instance, the saying “Green around the gills,” means a person is under the weather. It’s no wonder that Shakespeare used such a term when dealing with such a turbulent emotion.

    Jealousy is a feeling that stems from a psychological problem . Consequently, this emotional reaction affects both men and women equally. Some say that a little bit of this envious feeling is beneficial as it pushes a person to be better and strives for greater things.


    Unfortunately, when this condition takes on a compulsive form, then there can be severe consequences. Many relationships have met their demise because one partner was jealous over the other one. While it’s normal to feel a twinge of jealousy when you’re in love, having too much can drive a person away.

    What Causes Jealousy?

    Possessiveness can be a great motivator. If you feel that your appearance isn’t as good as another coworker, then you may buy new clothes and feel encouraged to do more. The emotional reaction that is involved in a jealous nature can make you step up your involvement at work or in a relationship as well as defeat your competitor.

    Some studies show that a marriage where one or both parties have some jealous nature about them form a happier union. Of course, these are ones that have healthy limits and don’t take it to the point of obsession. There is a fine line between being jealous and becoming obsessed.

    Love versus infatuation plays a role in jealousy

    It’s effortless to confuse being in love with someone with becoming infatuated and wanting to control their every move . When a person engages in such behaviors, it makes the other party feel like an object rather than a human being.

    A behavior that is meant to bring a person closer to you can end up suffocating them and driving them into someone else’s arms. No wonder science describes jealously as a complex emotion that has feelings that range from fear of abandonment and blinding rage.

    When there is distrust in a relationship, many say that insecurities in both parties cause it. You may have a lack of self-confidence because you were cheated on in the past. Or, your significant other may have displayed behaviors that have left you less than trusting.

    You must learn to get beyond the mentality that you have a claim on your significant other. They don’t belong to you, and you cannot do things that will ensure they will stay in your life.

    Sometimes, one person in the relationship will become jealous because they think their partner is more attractive than they deserve. They may engage in behaviors to try to keep this person or use words that come from the insecurities inside. In this situation, the person who feels less than might become obsessive and suspicious.

    The main source of jealousy in any relationship is formed from both insecurity and mistrust you have within yourself. Thus, these are the primary reasons for this emotional reaction.

    Five Primary Causes of Jealousy

    1. Problems with self-image
    2. Negative experiences with past relationships
    3. Fear of being abandoned
    4. Anxiety issues
    5. Prone to develop these feelings due to personality traits

    Understanding The Types of Jealousy?

    Did you know that being jealous is such an issue that scientists have divided it into three distinct categories? Here are the classifications:


    A person that is jealous of the reactive category has valid reasons for their issues. For instance, if your spouse has cheated on you once or many times in the past, then the diminishing level of trust that you have for them can fuel your jealous nature.



    Some partners tend to be a bit flirtatious. While you may not know of anything concrete between your spouse and another person, you may find this flirting to be suspicious to you. In many instances, nothing is going on between the other two people, and it’s your insecurities driving the issue.


    A jealous problem that is pathological is unhealthy. This person is someone that allows negative thoughts and hallucinations to dominate their mind. A person suffering from this form of envy may become violent due to their irrational behaviors.

    The distrustful issues they have will affect all aspects of their life, and it can also affect their health. They may suffer from high blood pressure, anxiety, and they can go to the brink of insanity with their delusions.

    Why Obsessive Jealousy is Dangerous?

    At the crux of any jealous issue is mistrust from within. A person can develop obsessive ideas for the smallest of reasons. Take, for instance, a spouse working over a couple of hours due to a meeting.

    The partner may be at the office working away. However, when your partner leaves you home alone for hours, your mind may begin to distrust and ruminate over past various scenarios that make you miserable.

    If you have a problem with distrust, then you may begin to think that your partner is cheating because they are working late. As these thoughts take over your mind, you may start to believe them to be accurate, even when you have no proof of such a deed.

    Hours of contemplation and doubt about their whereabouts can cause you to have a different attitude and behavior towards them. All these imaginary scenarios your mind created are not founded, yet you will believe them. The first step in getting help for your jealous nature is to admit that you have a problem.

    Steps Towards Healing

    Did you know that your jealous nature may be hereditary? It’s true; if your mom or dad suffered from an extremely jealous personality, then they can pass those traits along to you. However, the most common reason that you have developed this suspicious demeanor is that things in your life have affected you negatively.

    The mental health community believes that a jealous person has a lack of confidence in themselves that drives this envious nature. It doesn’t matter what caused the problem, as it’s reassuring to know that it can be cured. You must be aware that you suffer from jealousy, and you must be open to getting help.

    You must learn how to control your jealous nature to keep it from destroying what may be a good relationship. Here are the keys to tackling this issue:

    1. Identify the Source

    As previously mentioned, you must identify why you are so distrustful in your partner. Do you have low self-esteem, feeling that you’re less than, or have a general mistrust in other human beings? When you have these underlying issues, then you are vulnerable, and it will drive your fear of being abandoned.

    You may find it helpful to make a list of the things that bother you in your relationship. Remember, you must separate reality from imagination. The key is to be able to determine what is driven by fear and what is driven by action.

    2. Boost Your Self-Confidence

    You must remember your self-worth even when faced with someone who makes you feel that you’re less than them. You have good qualities, and you should never compare yourself to someone else.

    If you find yourself constantly comparing yourself to others, then sit down and make a list of all your attributes. Chances are, you will find out some pretty amazing things about yourself you didn’t even realize. Why not list all the reasons that your partner chose you in the first place?

    3. Look at Past Relationships

    You should start by evaluating your previous relationships. Were you jealous of other lovers? Did you find yourself having the same issues in previous relationships that you have now?

    If you find that this is an ongoing issue, then you need to get professional help for this problem. Having a jealousy issue doesn’t usually go away on its own, and it can magnify and become an obsession. With a good therapist and a great deal of work, you can overcome this problem.

    You mustn’t play the blame game. If you didn’t have issues with jealousy previously, then you must determine what it is about your current relationship that is sparking these feelings? It’s time to have an open and honest conversation with your partner about the things in your relationship that make you feel uneasy.

    Final Thoughts: Stopping the Vicious Cycle of Jealousy

    Lastly, when it comes to a jealous nature, you must remember that any suspicions or obsessions you have will only be amplified if you continually repeat them. Stop ruminating on things that you have no proof of and avoid repetitive thought processes of something that doesn’t even exist. You can and will get through this if you are determined not to let jealousy ruin your life.

    Your subscription could not be saved. Please try again.

    ThankThank you! Your free book preview is in your email. If you don’t see it immediately, please check your spam or promotions folder.

    What causes insane jealousy?
    Morbid jealousy can occur in a number of conditions such as chronic alcoholism, addiction to substances other than alcohol (i.e. cocaine, amphetamines, marijuana.), organic brain disorders (i.e. Parkinson's, Huntington's), schizophrenia, neurosis, affective disturbances or personality disorders. more
    What is Insan in Islam?
    Islam uses the word “INSAN” for a human being and “Insanyiat” as a quality of a human being with reference to behavior or “Ikhlaq” of human beings and their treatment of each other. more
    How did pirates get their names?
    When Bierbauer didn't sign back with Philadelphia as expected, however, Pittsburgh drew criticism from the Athletics and American Association officials who called those actions “piratical.” Accused of plundering players, the Alleghenys then became known informally as “pirates.” Pittsburgh officially nicknamed itself more
    What language do Wookies speak?
    Shyriiwook They have three different languages. Chewbacca speaks a dialect called Shyriiwook, while other Wookiees may speak either Thykarann or Xaczik. Shyriiwook is the most common to understand, however, as both Han Solo and Rey can decipher Chewie's grunts. more
    What was Hitler's Myers-Briggs?
    Which personality type was Adolf Hitler? Adolf Hitler was an unhealthy INFJ personality type. He tended to feel resentful of other people and this could have been the driving force behind some of his actions. more
    Are there female stormtroopers?
    There are a lot of women in the stormtrooper ranks in Star Wars Battlefront II. In the Force Awakens there are a few women playing stormtroopers throughout the film as can be seen in some of the behind the scenes material. more
    Why did the Mongols drink blood?
    While everyone likes to talk about how scary the Spartans or Romans could be, it was the Mongols who pioneered new warfare tactics, used them to win battle after battle, and survived on a diet of horse blood and liquor to ride across whatever terrain they needed to in order to murder you. more
    Should you touch a cat's nose?
    Like us, cats prefer that we ask if it's okay before we touch. Felines who are friends greet each other by touching noses. A human head is too big to really mimic that behavior, but a human fingertip is just about the size of that adorable triangle of skin at the tip of a cat's nose. more
    Why do Bulldogs choke?
    Brachycephalic Obstructive Airway Syndrome These dogs are born with a soft palate that obstructs airflow into their lungs. Your bulldog will have difficulty in breathing and will retch or gag especially while swallowing. more
    Do ear mites smell in dogs?
    Mite infestations can cause a foul odor in your dog's ears. You may also see a buildup of dark debris in your dog's ears, similar to coffee grounds. As you examine your dog's ears, look for redness in the ear canal as well as the outer ear, as this is another sign of ear problems in dogs. more
    What should bearded dragons never eat?
    What not to feed Bearded Dragons – 21 foods that can be toxic
    • Onions and Chives. Onions, raw or cooked, should not be fed to bearded dragons.
    • Mushrooms. Mushrooms contain high phosphorus and acidic content and can be toxic to bearded dragons among ingestion.
    • Leeks.
    • Garlic.
    • Rhubarb.
    • Avocados.
    • Eggplants.
    • Iceberg lettuce.


    You may be interested in...

    What happens when you become a Chick-fil-A red member?

    What documents do you need when you start a new job?

    What is the payment for Youtubers?

    What are the levels of history?

    How do you write a problem statement in agile?

    How does metformin affect the brain?

    What military is in Syria?

    Why bitcoin keep falling?

    How much cash should you carry?

    How do you show hidden text in PDF?

    How do you use Olay retinol 24?

    Is it good to invest in crypto?

    What is the brown dog on the chewy commercial?

    What are the seven key points for a critical incident stress debriefing?

    Which states pay doctors the most?

    About Privacy Contact
    ©2022 REPOKIT